Yet another ingenius use for duct tape!!!
I’ve warned you of the dangers of giving unsolicited advice. But I am, of course, a giant hypocrite so I’ll be continuing my list of diet tips today. I am aware that everyone is different, and different things work for different people. Some people have zero issue with disconnecting themselves from food- seeing it strictly as a source of fuel, not pleasure or enjoyment. Good for them. I am not one of those people, and I know there are many others out there like me. Maybe some of these ideas will help you, maybe you will think it’s all a load of crap. Either way….I try.
- Pack a lunch. No, I don’t mean this in a “take a hike” sort of way. I seriously mean pack a lunch, and a snack, and breakfast, and dinner if you have to. Always keep good diet food on hand so that you don’t get caught off guard. You know….”oh, I forgot my lunch so I’ll just swing through the drive through and grab a burger….just this once”. I’m sure I look like a total idiot walking around with a bag of food everywhere I go, but it’s an essential part of this whole weight loss game.
- Never get hungry. Another reason to always have good food on hand….hunger is your enemy. If you get hungry, you are that much more likely to grab the nearest food-like item and shove it in your mouth. This is when the 4 year old dust encrusted snickers bar at the check-out counter of the gas station becomes the most appealing item in the entire universe. Or a four day old doughnut that was so disgusting that no one else would eat it suddenly becomes the most tasty and delicious morsel you’ve ever laid eyes on. It’s amazing the tricks your mind can play on you. If you do get stuck without any food when the hunger daemons start staging a war inside your belly, try to stick with things like nuts and jerky…not granola bars and other sugary snacks.
- Coffee is life. I swear I should buy stock in Caribou coffee right now. I think I’m single handedly supporting the Midwestern region. I drink it half strength so I’m not totally ODing on caffeine, but even a little bit helps. It keeps me from obsessing about food and it tastes good.
- Cheat days are total BS. People always talk about cheat days when they talk about dieting. Lots of people thing they’re great, but here’s the reality. You can do awesome all week long. Then you give yourself an entire day of “cheating”, and you can flush your entire week of effort down the toilet. That is if you’re anything like me. I take one step down the “cheat for a day” road and something triggers in my brain. One chunk of ear off a milk chocolate Easter bunny, and I’m toast. I swear the sugar activates some sort of gluttonous disorder that forces me to drive to the nearest DQ and get a blizzard, then I find myself neck deep in a pizza, and before you know it I’m devouring a bag of cheese popcorn and washing it down with an entire 2 liter of coke. WTF? So instead of cheat days think smaller- cheat meals or even cheat items. One step down the cheat road and then you’re right back on the suffering and punishment road of dieting.
- Lastly….in all seriousness, quit eating. Not everything, just anything that you actually want to eat. Chances are that if it tastes good or if you’re craving it in any way, you really shouldn’t be eating it. So just put it down and forget about it. Step away from the Cheetos.
Alright, I promise that will be the end of my pearls of wisdom for now. In other news, my workouts have been going great this week. I think my body is finally starting to adjust to this weight! Both my squat and bench workouts went well- 5×2 at 195 pounds and 5×2 at 140 pounds, yay! If this keeps up, I think I’ll actually manage to put up some numbers at the next meet that aren’t even all that embarrassing. Phew!