I’m not sure what it is about me. There are multiple theories floating around out there. Maybe it’s the look on my face. Take Britney for example. I bet you a million dollars she’s going for sexy in this shot…..but that’s not at all how it turned out.
She looks like a demon is about to burst from the depths of her soul at any moment. Maybe that’s how I look? Maybe when I’m going for kind and understanding, I’m really coming up with “one false move and I will gut you!” Could be.
Or maybe it’s more like these little guys. I just can’t hide the inner doubt/disgust/shock/horror that I’m actually experiencing while talking with the cashier at the grocery store.
OMG…..Is that back fat hanging out of her tube top????
I honestly have no idea, but it never fails. Where ever I go, inevitably some one ends up angry. It could be as simple as a trip to the mall with my mom and my maid of honor. Shopping for wedding shoes, a girls dream. After pouring through every isle in the store, we finally came up with a pair that we thought would work. After trying them, I took said pair up to the cashier to check out. When the cashier checked the shoes, turns out they were two different sizes.
Cashier: Do you want the 6 or the 6.5?
Me: I’m not sure. I tried them on and booth shoes fit fine. (Pause while gazing upward in an obvious “I’m thinking” pose.)
Cashier: Well, it’s a mismatch and I can’t sell them that way so you’re gonna have to Pick One. (Said with and evil and condescending tone.)
Me: ever so politely slid the shoe box across the counter and walked out.
Really? Did she really think that I was deviously trying to buy two different shoes? And that I was arguing with her to let me take home two different shoes? Holy smokes. Needless to say, my quest for wedding shoes continues. Send suggestions my way!!
My magical gift continued on a pit stop at Wendy’s. I’m a fan of their tasty salads when I’m in a pinch for lunch. I usually get the cobb salad minus the cobb (read lettuce and chicken). I’ve ordered it multiple times, but I had yet to encounter the red headed clerk of doom.
Me: Hi, I’d like a cobb salad with just lettuce and chicken.
Cashier: Um….they come, like, premade.
Me: Oh….I’ve ordered them different before and they just make me a new one.
Cashier: Fine….hey (salad girl who’s name I’ve forgotten) can you make me a cobb salad?
Salad Girl: Sure, what do you want on it?
Me: Just Chicken please (to the very nice salad girl).
You see, the cashier wasn’t even the one that had to make the salad. And the woman that had to make the salad was totally cool with it. WTF?
I’m crossing my finger that the whole bad things come in three’s in true because I had a third run in this weekend at GNC. I don’t typically enjoy going in to that store because of their sometimes pushy sales approach, but I was out of protein powder and decided to make a quick stop since I was at the mall anyway. I went in for my usual and was immediately intercepted by @sshole sales guy of the month, Andrew.
Andrew: Can I help you find something.
Me: Nope, I’m just here for my usual.
Andrew: Have you tried out insanely over priced brand over here on this shelf?
Me: Yes, I tried it last time, but it’s just too expensive for me.
Andrew: Well, the stuff you’re buying only allows half of the protein to actually absorb in your body because it’s such a low quality protein (direct quote).
Me: Okay, but I still can’t afford the other stuff and I think this product gives me what I need.
Andrew: Fine, but that stuff is loaded with fat and cholesterol. (and walks away)
Uh…..jeez. I didn’t realize GNC sold heart attack in a powered, chocolate flavored format. So, I compared the fat and cholesterol to other containers and was not horrified by what I saw. Just as I planned, I grabbed my usual and went to check out.
Andrew: (grabs my crappy protein powder choice and starts ringing me up in total silence sans all eye contact.)
Me: (I couldn’t let it go) Wow, you’re pretty crabby. Is that your sale technique or something?
Me: Well, you understand that people’s price points are different, right?
Andrew: Yeah, but I didn’t want to get cut off again. And I was going to tell you about another product that’s better than what you’re getting, but a lot cheaper. But now I’m not going to because I don’t want to get cut off again.
So please, let me know if you guys figure out what the super secret and magical protein powder is at GNC. Apparently I wasn’t deserving of knowing. So maybe I cut the guy off, but not every one is up for the full blown sales pitch. And when you’re in customer service, it’s your job to back off when the customer says they’re not interested. Or at least take a different approach. I’m now convinced that GNC trains their staff to be degrading and insulting in order to bully their customers in to buying more expensive products. My solution…I’m never going back. I’m going to buy lead enhanced black market protein powder fromChinafrom now on. I’ll show them!!!